On being a mom during a busy season.
I'm writing this as I drink my iced quad shot espresso, which was followed by a Diet Pepsi.
Normally it would have been my second Diet Pepsi of the day, but I dropped my first one on the kitchen floor, trying to get out the door before I was late, where it exploded and puddled as I held Cal; cursed and then cleaned it up.
So yeah - it's been one of those days. I bet you've had them too.
Last night Chandler slept with us - I was so tired last night, but he wasn't, so I tucked him into bed with us, turned on Paw Patrol, set the sleep timer on the TV and then promptly fell asleep. #momoftheyear I'm not sure when Chandler fell asleep - but he didn't get out of bed, and I woke up to him kicking me in the side at 11:30 pm, and then 3:00 am and then woke to him having wet through his diaper at 4:10 am. With half an eye open, I changed his diaper, pulled off his wet jammie pants, laid down a blanket over the half damp spot on the sheets and we all went back to bed. Except Chandler had turned sideways in bed, to tuck into Clint's arm and there was no room for me to sleep. So I did what any mom in my position would do - I put my pillow at the foot of the bed, laid down and promptly slept through both alarms. Luckily, Cal woke up early at 5:10 am needing a bottle, and that woke me up so that I had to rush and leave the house with damp hair (because Chandler broke my blow dryer last weekend playing with it) but at least we got out the door without being late to work.
I bet you've had some of those nights and mornings too.
But it's worth it. And when I try to type out a reason....all I know is a feeling.
A feeling that I wouldn't trade for anything.
We've been going hard, and will keep going hard, which is normal for this time of year. We all could use some extra sleep at the Sexson household but we only have one more month to push through. Then we'll meet late June with more evenings at home, in the AC, and a normal bed time.
For real. This life - we choose it. Some days I'm not sure why, and then others it smacks me in the face - we're doing this, because we can do it together, because it lets us travel and see new things, and because it allows us to show our boys a lifestyle that is stamped with work ethics, honesty, hard work and reliability.
And the fact that I get to do it all with my kids isn't lost on me.